finishing off my challenge: three pictures of myself, something i’m worrying about, two good things that have happened recently, three things i want to change and how i’ve changed this month.
three pictures of yourself.
something you’re worrying about.
I’m worrying about how this year will turn out. This is the year that pretty much determines what I’m going to be in the future - well that’s how I think of it. I want to pursue medicine as a career but in Sydney getting into medicine is so unbelievably competitive I don’t think I’ll ever have a chance. And in order for me to get into medicine I need a UMAT score of above 80 and ATAR above 95 depending on UMAT. So I’m just going to aim high (99+ ATAR and 90+ UMAT and if I fall short hopefully I won’t fall too short).
two good things that happened recently.
- I realised that I stopped liking him :)
- I’m set on a new goal and I plan to achieve it? LOL I dunno :L
three things you want to change about yourself.
- I want to change my weight. I’m not happy at the moment with my body :/
- I want to change my self-esteem. I see myself in a really negative light and I doubt myself a lot of the time and that isn’t really healthy.
- I don’t want to be so awkward anymore - I don’t know if I’m awkward because I THINK I’m awkward or not but yeah :L
How you’ve changed this month.
I think I’ve changed a lot this month. I think I’ve realised that I should stop doubting myself so much when it comes to a lot of situations - most of the time it turns out that because I doubt myself so much I end up screwing things over and if I didn’t have so much doubt I would’ve been fine in the first place. I’ve also realised this month that I shouldn’t like someone based on how they look and just think I know how they’ll be based on that because it doesn’t usually work out as I’d like to and the majority of the time I’m glad that it doesn’t. I think I’ve also become a nicer person in general. I dunno ahaha I think I’ve matured quite a bit this month tooand I’m also trying to think in a more positive attitude I guess :)
challenge day 23 : something you’re really excited for
end of this year - well November to come, cause I’ll finally finish high school :)
and then i can go america and gold coast and like party and drink and not have to worry about anything for 3 months before uni starts :D
challenge day 22 : the nicest thing you’ve ever done.
Eh.. I have no idea :)
challenge day 21 :your family is like (siblings)
Um I think my family’s kinda normal-ish.. haha i dunno how to describe it.
I’m tight with my mum and I can tell her almost everything but sometimes some of the things I need to tell her, I don’t think she’ll understand so I just hold off from telling her. She trusts me though, so that’s good :) :)
My dad and me aren’t exactly as tight as I’d like us to be, he’s always at work, working for money and I barely ever get to see him. At dinner and stuff I’ll talk to him, but its mainly just academics and he’s really overprotective of me which sometimes pushes me away.
My brother and me have gotten tighter - I used to think he hated me and like he wish he never had a little sister but I’m beginning to see that he’s actually a really nice loving brother and he does care about me :)
challenge day 20: the last fight or argument you had.
It was probably with my mum about my extremely messy room :/
challenge day 19: your opinion on alcohol
I remember when I was a kid, I swore that I would never drink, take drugs or smoke. And I guess I can still keep to the drugs and smoking bit as for the drinking bit, I don’t think I can really keep to that little promise I made to myself anymore… I think it’s because I’m getting older. I’m not actually against alcohol at all, even though I’ve never tried it, it’s kind of a social drink, and I guess it can be pretty fun. But when it comes to over-drinking, I’m not really supportive of that. I have this uncle who had a drinking addiction and he sort of started abusing his wife and stuff and it just got waaaay out of hand, like his friends and family just didn’t want to know him anymore and now after rehab, he’s all better now. So in my opinion, I have no problem whatsoever with drinking, I’m planning to drink at the end of the year to celebrate the end of high school and maybe get smashed once just to know what it feels like, but as long as you don’t drink too much to the point where it gets out of hand, I’m all for it.
challenge day 18: your opinion on drugs
Again I think this is up to personal preference but I personally wouldn’t take any drugs unless I’m like sick or anything. I’m pretty against the whole idea of taking drugs for myself because I don’t want to get hooked and have to face with the problems that comes with addiction and any strains that may be placed on my relationships with my friends or family etc. But that’s to the extreme end of things and I’m sure a lot of people who do take drugs don’t end up on that extreme side. At least when people do take drugs, they don’t do it too openly like smokers who seem to have to drag me into their health issues too with the passive smoking crap. Yeah I’m really against smokers.
day 17: thoughts on religion
I think it’s essentially up to each person’s beliefs when it comes to religion. I know a lot of people may be devoted to their religion or some people may oppose it but I myself am Buddhist. I know in the past I’ve thought myself to be half-atheist and half-buddhist because I don’t really go to the temple but sometimes I still do pray and if I had to choose a religion I would choose Buddhism anyway. But in the end I think religion is something that should be left to each individual’s opinions.
day 16: something you love.
I love the random gestures of kindness that someone does if that makes sense. Like the unexpected things. It feels so nice haha :):)
day 15: something you hate.
I’m sort of a hypocrite in saying this but I hate it when someone starts telling you something then they stop midway and go “pretend I never said anything” or “nevermind.” Especially if its something that relates to me… in starting to tell me something I sort of want to the know the rest and I get all annoyed if they just stop midway ergh.
And also I hate it when someone hears something I’m saying to a close friend, like something personal.. and they decide that it’s okay to pester me until they know what I was talking about. Yeah I hate that too erghh.
challenge day 14: five things you want to say to five people.
- Thanks for being such a supportive friend and I know you always have my back when things get nastyyyyy. Thanks for being the gym buddy I need and thanks for just being there when I need someone talk to. Can’t wait to party with you at the end of this year and thanks in advance for looking after my drunk ass :)
- I’m sorry I was so slack and cold when I first started to you - I didn’t mean to be so cold, I just start distancing myself when I know someone likes me.
- Sometimes I feel like when I talk to you you treat me as though I’m some weirdo alien from a distant planet who freaks the crap out of you but I know deep down you’re a nice guy - I’ve known you for like almost 7 years now, and I wish you all the best for the future :)
- We’ve grown distant over the past couple of years and to be frank I don’t really care that we’re not close anymore but I’m still here if you ever need someone to talk to.
- Idgaf about you anymore, you’re getting really annoying and I just want to say that you don’t want to piss me off when I’m pmsing like I am now hmmh.
challenge day 13: what kind of person attracts you.
Guys that attract me tend to be the guys who look cold but when you get to know them they aren’t. So being cold is just on the exterior, I don’t know I just feel like it’s kind of mysterious LOL. Anyways, appearance wise guys who have nice hair, a nice smile and sort of toned body attracts me. As for personality, no guys I know have attracted me with their personality, but guys who have a good sense of humour and guys who can be playful yet know when to be serious and caring but not clingy would probably attract me :)
